“He tends His flock like a shepherd. He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart; He gently leads those that have young.” (Isaiah 40:11)
Dearest Daughters,
If we are called to be our children’s first window to God and a reflection of His love, then how do we mother our children in a way that reveals His face to them?
If God is love, and we are made in His image, then we, too, must become love. We must express more than vague, fuzzy feelings. We must be a living, breathing presence of God’s love in our children’s daily lives. They must see love radiating through us in how we speak, serve, forgive, and endure.
If they are to understand the comfort of God, they must first feel it while rocking in our arms.
In Isaiah 66, the Lord says, “As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you.” God Himself compares His tenderness to the way a mother carries her baby on her hip and bounces him on her knees (Isa. 66:12-13).
If our children are to experience God’s attentiveness, they must see it in how we listen to them and to others. The Psalms say the Lord bends low to hear our cries (Ps. 116:2). Do they see us do the same?
We must be His hands for them—clothing, feeding, holding and comforting.
If God is holy, then holiness must be more than “churchy” rituals. It must govern how we live and conduct ourselves even in the privacy of our own home. God’s holiness must determine how we speak, even when only our family is there to hear us. It must guide our repentance when God deals with us. And they must see His holiness in the ways we show reverence toward God and those He sends into our everyday life.
If God is powerful, let our children see His strength most clearly in our weakness, in how we keep showing up for others day after day. Let them see His power in how we get up with joy in the morning even when we’re tired! Let them see the incredible power of God that causes you to keep lifting your head in victory, even when He disciplines you. A mother who leans on God allows His strength to be made visible to others. The most powerful witness of supernatural anointing takes place when we’re exhausted. Faith’s greatest testimony can be made real in the midst of our own fears. And true grace rises again, even after failures!
If God is mighty to save, then we reflect that might when we stand firm and go to war against every thought, attitude and distraction that seeks to harm our children’s hearts. This is how they begin to know that God is a rescuer.
Even science confirms that a mother’s presence in the early years is essential. God created the brain just as He created the soul, and everything in its design reflects what we often know intuitively—that children need closeness, stability, and attentiveness in order to thrive.
During the first three years of life, the brain forms more than a million neural connections per second. Those early relationship interactions shape their emotions, ability to learn, their language, resilience and even the child’s identity. God made human souls to grow and thrive through a mother’s presence, and they will not develop to their maximum capacity without that!
So the calling of motherhood is sacred. It is both spiritual and physiological, and it begins with you.
I want to tell you a story.
Years ago, your dad and I were driving home late one night down Halbert Lane. Just ahead of us, the car in front of us hit one of three raccoon cubs that were trailing behind their mother. It didn’t die immediately, but was wounded and immobilized, and crying on the pavement.
We slammed on the brakes, trying not to hit the others, and watched as the scene unfolded in our headlights.
The mother raccoon had already crossed the road with her two surviving babies, but when she saw our headlights, she stopped.
Then she did something that moved me to tears. She ran back into the oncoming traffic.
Darting into the road, she grabbed the injured and dying cub, still crying and writhing, and she dragged it to the side of the road where she huddled with all three little ones.
I lay awake that night thinking about her, not that I’m particularly sentimental about raccoons (they’ve raided our eggs enough times, as you well know). But I couldn’t stop thinking about that mothering instinct, the single-minded, God-given drive to preserve little lives no matter the cost.
If an animal can stare into the face of danger and still run out into it to save her young, has God not placed that also inside the heart of a human mother? What strength has He given us? What courage? What zealous fire did He entrust to us?
I want that fire! I want to be the kind of woman who sees the onslaught of the world and still steps out into the road, believing God will help me bring my children to safety.
You may ask yourself, Why do I want to be a mother?
I believe there are three reasons why women choose the path of motherhood.
The first is the challenge, an instinctive knowing that our bodies were made to give birth to life, and a deep curiosity: Can I do it? Do I have what it takes?
The second is purpose—a sense that motherhood is part of something eternal. As Christians, we believe the work of God continues and is sustained through families. When we raise children, we participate in building the Kingdom, in passing on belief and conviction, and so it becomes an act of faith!
And then there is the third reason—love.
I’m not talking about the theory of love or even just a feeling, but a kind of love that stretches you, grows you, humbles you, and utterly transforms you.
When I was newly engaged, I believe it was primarily the first two reasons that made me want to be a mom. I wanted children—maybe a few—and I felt both the challenge and the deeper purpose.
Could I really do it?
But once I held my first child—you, Helen, everything changed.
That third reason—love—took over me, consumed me, and it completely transformed me and all my perspectives.
I realized I had never known the full capacity of my own heart until I became a mother. Something in me awakened, and I wanted to go to the farthest reaches of love, to discover how far it could stretch me and how deep it could reach through me. I wanted to increase love in myself, in others and in the world around me.
I wanted to show you children what love looks like when it is the life we live. I wanted to see what it would produce when it grows out of the soil of a surrendered heart and sends down deep roots into the soul. I know I haven’t done this perfectly, but I have been utterly changed by trying my best.
After twenty-seven years of mothering, I can tell you this: Motherhood will ask more of you than you ever expected. And it will give you back more than you can possibly contain. So let it overflow!
Now it’s your turn. Let God’s fire of loving motherhood burn bright in you.
With all my love,
Mom